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WadeRandolph.com |
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6/07/05 Dear
The Honeymooners, Could you please tell me how the new, updated movie version of "The Honeymooners" is a remake of the classic television version of "The Honeymooners"? I mean, seriously? What does it have to do with it? Thanks,
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Dear Wade, The new, updated movie version of "The Honeymooners" is exactly like its classic television counterpart. The characters interact. They laugh, they love, they fight. Ralph Kramden is still fat! And his friend, Ed Norton is still zany! Only now, Ralph and Ed are con artists. Sincerely, Dear The Honeymooners, What? Thanks, Dear Wade, You know, con artists. They think of get rich quick schemes. And also, Ralph doesn't threaten his wife with spousal abuse. We took a little of the good, got rid of the bad, then added a our own new version of the bad. Shook it all up, spread it on a baking pan and cooked it for about a half hour. This is what we came up with. Sincerely, Dear The Honeymooners, But wasn't the threat of spousal abuse the one classic, quotable line from "The Honeymooners"? I think this movie is a bad idea. Also, how does this:
Equal this:
Thanks, Dear Wade, You opinion is duly noted. Could it be, perhaps, that you disagree with the casting of "The Honeymooners"? I hate to use the word "racist" but I think you are a racist. Sincerely, Dear The Honeymooners, Wait, I didn't -- Dear Wade, Racist. Sincerely, Dear The Honeymooners, How did you interrupt me? Aren't we writing letters, here? Anyway, I didn't mean to imply that I somehow have a problem with the cast. That is just not true. I do however think this movie is going to fail miserably. Thanks, Dear Wade, We don't give a shit what you think. You can kiss our honeymoon. Enclosed is a picture of a baby giving you the finger.
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