WadeRandolph

WadeRandolph.com

3/21/05

I Just Ate an Apple, and Now I Want to Kill Myself

When you work in television (not bragging - I hate my job) you eat a lot of terrible things. So, I've been trying to keep my snacks a little bit healthier lately. I got hungry today and thought, "What's healthier than an apple?" The answer? Nothing. It all started out okay. I'm one of those people that grew up twisting the stem off, and every time you twist, you say another sequential letter of the alphabet. Then, on the letter that it comes off, you have to name your kid something that starts with that letter. To this day I still do that. Apparently now my kid is going to be named Gary. (Let's hope it's a boy!)

So then I eat the apple, and it's good. Not great or anything. Just a normal apple, but this story isn't about the apple. It's about the pulsating pain that quickly began radiating from my gums after finishing the apple. It was like the oral equivalent to bamboo shoots under the fingernails. Does that happen to anybody else? I guess I've never really talked to anybody about their gums before. Maybe I have weird gums? Whatever.

[Previous | Home | Next]